First day on the job (a work of imagination)

Talk about mixed emotions. On one hand I was thrilled, first day on my dream job but then the sudden realisation of where my dream job would take me, hit home.

It was a 4am start to get to the spot safely and then I felt very much on my own, which of course I wasn’t. There was a translator, a guide, a reporter and a number of soldiers who had been assigned to look after us but even with all those people around me I still felt incredibly lonely.

To begin with I almost forget what I was there to do; I just couldn’t believe my surroundings. It must have been a good twenty minutes before I took my first shot. My first shot, huh, that saying holds a completely different meaning for me now, that’s for sure. I mean of course until I took my first photo, which in itself wasn’t that easy as the bullet proof vest restricts movement somewhat.

We travelled for a bit in which time I managed to get a lot of photos taken. Mostly these were of destroyed buildings, desolate streets and even the odd frame of anxious looking locals and children who were clearly aware of our presence and appeared to relax and breathe just that little bit easier once we had continued on our way and gone past them.

Of one thing I’m certain; if I am going to be able to do this job and to do it well I am going to have to toughen up.  For example, probably the most poignant photo I took today was one I almost didn’t take because I felt uncomfortable doing it.

We had come across some kind of guarded barrier with a lone guard, I’m sure he wasn’t on his own but I didn’t see anyone else at the time and I felt very intrusive as I stared this soldier straight in the face and raised my camera to take his picture, while he stood there observing us, as we all watched him.

“It’s what I’m here to do”, “It’s what I’m here to do” I kept running this phrase through my mind over and over and over again on a loop and trying to remind myself that in order to be the photojournalist I want to be, that I need to take honest, unbiased photos and to leave my own opinions and feelings at home. Though while looking into the soldier’s saddened eyes which have undoubtedly seen more horrors than I could ever imagine it was exceptionally hard, especially as once finished here I will get to go home and be sent on my next assignment while this young soldier will still be on guard in this hostile place and that’s if he’s one of the lucky ones.

Diary Entry from a man’s perspective (a work of imagination)

Today, she left me.

It’s not as if I haven’t been dreading this day for the last four years but still, I couldn’t help but feel shocked that she’d actually gone through with it.

I’ve been trying particularly hard over the last few months to be the poor, useless, defenceless husband so that she would feel she had to stay with me. I think the guilt she felt was working in my favour to start with but I pushed it that little bit too far and of course, to escape, she turned to him. Neil.

 

She’d never let anything about him slip before, not once in all these years, that was, until Sunday.

I was watching the game while she was in the kitchen, she’d prepared a tea of lasagne and salad for me, it was the same meal as every other Sunday. Then she shouted “Neil, come and get your tea”. The second she said it she froze. If I hadn’t been so taken by surprise I would have pretended that I was so engrossed in the game that I had not heard her, she would have believed that but sadly she was looking straight at me when she said it and there is no doubt that my face must have betrayed me.

We ate our tea in silence, she tidied away and once the kitchen was sparkling she turned to me and said, “I’ll leave by the end of the week”, that was it. I knew there was no point in trying to talk her out of it, we both knew that I knew about him but now that it was out in the open, there was no going back, no more pretending, no more us.

So, today as promised she left. I thought she would say goodbye in person but sadly no. I went to work, business as usual and when I got home there it was, a folded A4 piece of paper. I can’t even bear to re-write what she wrote but there it was, the end of thirteen years of marriage jotted down on a piece of scrap paper. Her usual perfectly neat handwriting was more of a scrawl, no doubt in her hurry to get out before I got home I assume.

What I'll do now, without her, I really do not know.

Where the path leads, nobody knows…

Since I was little, I’ve always liked paths. That sounds weird doesn’t it? OK, I know it does!

 

I blame my parents, in the best kind of way. For years they’ve had a number of paintings on the living room wall which they’ve collected from the countries they’ve lived in or visited , a few of which have paths leading through the scenes and I used to look at them often and wonder why the image of a simple path was so appealing.  

 

Dad and I agreed that there’s just something about not knowing where they lead, as if each one is the start of a potential adventure and when you look at it your mind wanders with the path.

 

I took this photo at a place nearby called Snape Maltings and every time I look at it I could get lost in thought.

 

When you look at it, where do you want the path to lead you?

Glenorchy (a work of imagination)

 

How long she had been staring she was unsure, but everything mundane around her had faded away. The cluttered desk, weighed down by the old computer and piles of paper was no longer visible. Where it had once stood was the image she knew so well. The place, which, for five glorious months she had called home.

 

High above her stood the familiar ragged snow capped mountains. Commanding the skyline and piercing the clouds above, the towered over the dark expansive lake below. The great lake in its tranquillity mirrored the perfect, breathtaking image above. Only the occasional silent water bird broke the stillness of the reflection as it glided across the surface.

 

It was her favourite time of day, a few more hours and the scene would be covered by darkness. The soft lighting that dusk provided complimented and softened the extremes of its surroundings and made it appear ever more beautiful. The wind was gentle but bitterly icy as it blew over her face and through her hair, but she had to get this shot. Whether in years to come she would still be able to conjure this place, as it stood at this moment in time, in her mind was not something she was willing to put to the test.

 

As she listened to the gentle click of the shutter, she was distracted by a soft noise in the background. As she shook herself out of her daze, she lent over and answered her work phone.

My little Saxon

 

Ever since I can remember I have wanted a dog, a border terrier to be specific and six years ago Dan said nine glorious words to me “I know someone who is having Border terrier puppies”.

 

It was a friend of a friend and we went along and met the little guys, I thought all my Christmases had come at once. I thought it’d be really hard to pick which little puppy would be the right addition to your life. When they are so tiny how on earth are you meant to know how they’ll grow up. Turns out it was such an easy choice!

We both held each one a few times, but there was something about little ‘two blue spots’ as he was then known that I just connected to I guess. I kept holding him over and over and saying to Dan “just hold this little guy again” and by the time we left that morning he was destined to be ours or should I say we were destined to be his and weeks later we got to bring him home.

Over the years I have taken countless photos of Saxon, on various walks, playing with his toys, generally being cute and scruffy, but I think this might be one of my favourites. Tell me you don’t look into those big brown eyes and want to smile?

I should also mention that while I write this post, he's sat curled up next to me, with his head resting on the corner of my laptop. Priceless and adorable!

Common themes, oh ok, obsessions!

I feel like I should tell you, as you’ll no doubt notice soon enough, there are a few things which I just can’t stop taking photos of.  

My current photo obsessions are clouds, sunsets, scenery and my dog Saxon, not in that order. There I’ve said it; you can’t say you weren’t pre-warned!

Feb Photo a Day

Before I forget, here's the Feb Photo a day list for those of you thinking about giving it a go...

Giving it a go

If you haven't already heard of Fat Mum Slim's photo a day phenomenon, where have you been? Seriously, if you like taking photos then you need to check it out.

I came across it on Twitter by accident really and have been hooked ever since. Each month @fatmumslim posts a list with a word or phrase for each day of the month and then it's up to you how you interpret it for your photo of the day.

Some are easy, some are SO tricky, but without a doubt each one makes you look at the things you see around you differently. I can say with certainty that the #photoaday prompts will definitely feature heavily on my blog.

But that’s not why I’m writing this post, this is why…

The other day I was reading one of Fat Mum Slim’s posts about how she got to where she is today, how-i-got-here and I felt inspired! So, I made a choice to start this blog and if you’ve read as far as this, I say thank you and welcome!